Slowing down is a process
Discover a rhythm of slowing down that fits your lifestyle, goals, and personality
"I wonder if slowing down will be useful."
"I can slow down today."
"Try slowing down for 30 days. Slowing down is a process. It takes time. It's not easy to slow down when you're accustomed to moving physically and mentally at a rapid pace."
"May I ask about your flow?"
In a spiritual direction session, my goal as a spiritual companion is to listen, not judge, pry, or try to fix. The hourly session is not about my story or what works for me. However, I sometimes need to share a tidbit of my story when asked. Bo Karen Lee, the founder and director of the Center for Contemplative Leadership at Princeton Theological Seminary, believes it builds relationships and trust when a spiritual directee asks the spiritual director about their story.
Kent Ira Groff, the founder of Oasis Ministries for Spiritual Growth, advises that before spiritual directors can "listen in on another's sacred script," they must "first listen to their own."
I have been listening to my sacred slow-down script for five years. I listened to the weariness in my body, such that I didn't want to arise from a well-needed nap or leave my laptop behind on a three-day getaway because I was "keeping pace in a hurried culture."
One year, I sat in the parking lot, wondering if I was serving in the capacity of a teacher or student. I worked as an adjunct lecturer at two universities and took doctoral courses at another. I didn't know where I was or what I was supposed to do. I was moving too fast in body, mind, and soul, crawling up the academic ladder—moving nowhere fast. My heart was restless, as fourth-century African theologian St. Augustine of Hippo advises when we are not resting in the Lord. When we continually desire change, we encounter restlessness in our heart and mind.
The saddest moment for me, sitting in my car in that parking lot, was the realization of my usual pace. Juggling, this and that, catching bits and pieces of my home, work, church, and community life, running on a treadmill, and lifting weights that were too heavy.
One afternoon, I served food at a church function. I offered my friend a plate. She asked me, "Do you ever sit down?" I sat. Then she asked, “Why are you working three jobs?”
These questions and concerns raised my awareness of the need to slow down—an awakening. I had to do more than decrease the speed on my treadmill; I had to discover a method, a way, and a rhythm of slowing down that fit my lifestyle, goals, and personality. Plain and simple, I had to desire the practice of slowing down. As IAMSON gently queries in the song "Slow Down," I had to ask myself, "Where are you going? What's so important that can't wait"
I offered the song "Slow Down" to my directee during our session, inviting her to practice slowing down for 30 days. I'd been listening to the lyrics since its release in 2023. The song reminded me to "be in the present moment, here in the blessings of today." Even though it’s been more than ten years since I drastically slowed down and transformed my pace from juggling this and that, catching bits and pieces, to a work-rest-play flow of unforced rhythms of grace.
Bayo Akomolafe writes that "'hurrying up' all the time, we often lose sight of the abundance of resources that might help us meet today's most challenging crisis. We frequently rush into the same patterns we're accustomed to. The call to slow down brings us face to face with the invisible, the hidden, the unremarked, the yet-to-be resolved." Akomolafe is reminded to slow down when he contemplates the African saying, "The times are urgent; let us slow down."
"The times are urgent; let us slow down."
Becoming aware of hurriedness raised my awareness to pause in between doing things. In a parked car, I set a ten-minute timer and took a deep breath. I did not text, check email, or turn on the radio. I just sat in the car trying to think about nothing. And it’s quite hard for me not to keep thinking. ( A few weeks ago, I talked about thinking about thinkinf in a live stream on Today’s Heart Matters: Thinking about Thinking. Listen if you have 4 minutes.) Not thinking for the woman who overthinks took unforced rhythms of grace, time, and patience. I had to trust that things would get done in God's timing and let go of things that were undone. I learned that undone things were not important or urgent, sometimes not even necessary.
The reason for slowing down originates from awareness, consciousness, willingness, and coming "face to face" with whatever or whomever you are avoiding, turning, or running away from. The process of slowing down can be useful when you raise your awareness to:
Urgent matters and pressing problems make you feel stressed or panicked.
Responsibilities that cause you not to take a nap or not wake up from that nap.
Distractions and demands forbid you from feeding your spirit with stillness.
Lacks the capacity to hear without an agenda or ego inflation.
The practice of slowing down begins with raising awareness. It is a slow process. It takes work. It is not easy. It can be done. Try lingering for a while, slowing down a little more each day in between things.
I began listening differently and becoming oddly more productive, letting things go, breathing better, or coming "face to face with the invisible." I’m living in the slow lane.
Source:
Kent Ira Groff, “Writing in the Dark to Love: Using a Pen as a Tool in Spiritual Companioning,” Presence: An International Journal of Spiritual Direction 15, no. 1 (2009): 34.
This is a message that I often need. When I left academia, I began to see that the need to juggle multiple things at once never left me, even as I attempted to leave it behind. I am physically called to adjust my pace, but my mind moves so fast that listening to my body often feels like a burden. However, I am shifting and listening. Thanks for sharing!
I learned to slow down during the COVID-19 Pandemic. I enjoy my intentional pauses. However, I feel like I loose some enthusiasm for my vocation and would rather pause for longer periods of time.